Mama_G_Hugs's Xanga

It's May!

Fri, 01 May 2009 06:13:06 GMT

It's May and it has been four months since I posted on this blog, but the time is nigh! Today is May 1st and it is a holiday here in blooming verdant Germany and we shall ride the silver horse with friends to celebrate! However, in this resplendent splendor called Spring which conjours up emotions of hope and romance, there is an invisible war raging and we must not forget we are called to be soldiers of the cross! Oh, how I picture that deceptive toothless conquored lion called Satan enjoying this time too because we can get so distracted by non eternal things as we can all year long. May it not be so! The beauty around us and the lusty feelings of May are but shadows of what is to come when Christ returns to restore us and the earth to its full glory - something often hard to imagine in view of beauty around us! Here are some words to hopefully stir and keep fellow soldiers and sojourners on track - keeping eternity in view and our King of Heaven and the city of Zion our goal ever pressing onward for His glory!

"With heaven's commander, sacrifice is ever the order of the day. All who follow him must take up a cross and deny themselves( how we hate this in contrast to the selfish self-focused world we live in) There are many who drop out on the way. They find complete obedience to His commands too hard. For them there must be an easier round to travel. A picnic, not a battlefield, suits them better. (Hey, I am all for picnics, but this is about perspective!). Our heavenly Commander is incomparable in that he was the first to fall in battle against Satan and his evil hordes. In His supreme victory all His followers are secure and by His death gather inspiration and strength to fight the good fight beneath his blood-red banner."

"The gospel is brought to us in terms of battle - the sword, the shield, the armor,, the soldier, the enemy , the fight. It is God who teaches our fingers to war. (Not as the world wars - for ours requires submitting out pride and getting on our knees in prayer as well as rescuing those in dark dungeons of sin and fear and shame through love and light.) As soldiers of the cross we must manifest a militant spirit. We must dare to be Daniel. In these days of spiritual delusion, abounding iniquity, and actions hostile to God and truth, we have need to pray for more iron in our blood, more courage in our piety, more of the bracing north in our personal witness!" (Seasons of the Lord by Herbert Lockyer)

May we not become weary, my fellow soldiers and travelers and may we not get off track and off target of why we are here as God's marching children!

FOR THE KINGDOM AND FOR THE KING....ONWARD!

love you all,
Mama G

On the Eve of a New Year...

Wed, 31 Dec 2008 11:16:16 GMT

It has been a long long time, but this is a day to reflect and thank God for His many countless blessings as we turn the corner to a New Year. I thank my Lord and abiding Savior, for my children and a family Christmas together.

I am thankful for God carrying my beloved friend, Michele through cancer...I love her

I am thankful for the adopted children in our life...

I am thankful for cuddling...

I am thankful for silly fun...
you will have to ask Rebecca the whys of this pic...hehe

and for child-like wonder...

And here's to trusting God on the evening of a New Year with new adventures and challenges ahead...

This picture is thanks for the artistic gifting of Michele...

A blessed New Year...For the Kingdom!!!

Laughter and Tears

Tue, 07 Oct 2008 11:17:05 GMT

"Even in laughter the heart may be in pain, And the end of joy may be grief." Proverbs 14:13

The last three days have been such precious gifts of fellowship and reunion. I never anticipated that the goodbye, the ache with the joy, would cut so deeply in my spirit making swallowing hard and words stuck in my throat. Watching the two precious sweethearts heading towards the BFA parking lot was such a sweet image that welled up my heart with joyful grief.

Fred and Jen Inglis, two BFA alum, who courted and hung out a lot in our home back in those class of 03 days. They have been married now for three years and living in Oxford studying and abiding together. Fred was Josh's beloved forest adventurer and fellow bard back in the days of cross-country and nintendo overnights, dressing up and romancing the girls. Jen came her junior year and chose God in the first few weeks during Spiritual emphasis week. She was one of my girls. We laughed and cried together and did lots and lots of praying. Fred is brilliant and was valedictorian with his lovely british swedish accent and Hugh Grant air, relaxed and gentlemanly. They are both permanenetly woven into the tapestry of our lives and we will always love them.

Last night we had a mixed gathering of old and new friends at our house. Andrew and Alyssa and Jen and Fred saw each other after five long years post grad. Rebecca and Deece and and aunt and uncle Beeh were also there as witnesses. Oh the reminisching and laughter, the former dorm sisters huddled together on the couch, all of them telling stories and asking questions.

There was an aching missing piece...Josh, but he was certainly there in spirit if our memories alone were enough to conjour up his presence.

So after a long walk to Holzen with Jen and Fred on Sunday, a warm reunion fellowship on MOnday and a sweet time of talk of the meaning of "home" and friendship and then a prayer today, my heart is full, but there is a sense of expectancy, of yearning, a time when there will be no more goodbyes and no more tears.

I must choose to embrace the pain today celebrating the joy of today and tomorrow and eternity.

Mama G misses you all...

Loneliness

Thu, 14 Aug 2008 07:38:32 GMT

I am backtracking a bit to include in this entry a passage quoted by Henri Nouwen, a spiritually insightful catholic priest. It was sent to many loved ones with a request for their personal response and have recieved some thought provoking words in return, so I thought to open it up further to anyone else....so journey with me, please.

Here is the passage:

Henri Nouwen on loneliness

A Source of Beauty from The Wounded Healer

We live in a society in which loneliness has become one of the most painful human wounds. The growing competition and rivalry which pervades our lives from birth have created in us an acute awareness of our isolation. This awareness has in turn left many with a heightened anxiety and an intense search for the experience of unity and community. It has also led people to ask anew how love, friendship, brotherhood and sisterhood can free them from isolation and offer them a sense of intimacy and belonging…

But the more I think about loneliness, the more I think that the wound of loneliness is like the Grand Canyon – a deep incision in the surface of our existence which has become an inexhaustible source of beauty and self-understanding…The Christian way of life does not take away our loneliness; it protects and cherishes it as a precious gift. Sometimes it seems as if we do everything possible to avoid the painful confrontation with our basic human loneliness, and allow ourselves to be trapped by false gods promising immediate satisfaction and quick relief. But perhaps the painful awareness of loneliness is an invitation to transcend our limitations and look beyond the boundaries of our existence. The awareness of loneliness might be a gift we must protect and guard, because our loneliness reveals to us and inner emptiness that can be destructive when misunderstood, but filled with promise for him who can tolerate its sweet pain.

When we are impatient, when we want to give up our loneliness and try to overcome the separation and incompleteness we feel too soon, we easily relate to our human world with devastating expectations. We ignore what we already know with a deep-seated, intuitive knowledge – that no love or friendship, no intimate embrace or tender kiss, not community, commune or collective, no man or woman, will be able to satisfy our desire to be released from our lonely condition. This truth is so disconcerting and painful that we are more prone to play games with our fantasies than to face the truth of our existence. Thus we keep hoping that one day we will find the man who really understands our experiences, the woman who will bring peace to our restless life, the job where we can fulfill, our potential, the book which will explain everything, and the place where we can feel at home. Such false hope leads us to make exhausting demands and prepares us for bitterness and dangerous hostility when we start discovering that nobody, and nothing, can live up to our absolutistic expectations.

Notice the rainbow in this picture of the Grand Canyon...thought that was pretty appropriate, what about you? There is more coming...

Joy in the Journey,

Renee aka Mama G

Take time to be holy?

Wed, 13 Aug 2008 09:47:01 GMT

Today while reading my textbook, Living By the Book, Howie, the author, mentions a hymn that is rarely sung anymore...I wonder why...

Take time to be holy, speak oft with thy Lord;
Abide in Him always, and feed on His Word.
Make friends of God’s children, help those who are weak,
Forgetting in nothing His blessing to seek.

Take time to be holy, the world rushes on;
Spend much time in secret, with Jesus alone.
By looking to Jesus, like Him thou shalt be;
Thy friends in thy conduct His likeness shall see.

Take time to be holy, let Him be thy Guide;
And run not before Him, whatever betide.
In joy or in sorrow, still follow the Lord,
And, looking to Jesus, still trust in His Word.

Take time to be holy, be calm in thy soul,
Each thought and each motive beneath His control.
Thus led by His Spirit to fountains of love,
Thou soon shalt be fitted for service above.

by William D. Longstaff, 1882. (historical note: this writer was part of the Moody-Sankey evangelistic team in England and wrote this after hearing a sermon on 1 Peter 1:15, 16.) What does this passage say to you?

Howie writes: "time is exactly what it takes to become holy. We can't be holy in a hurry! Yet, we live in an instant society and a distracted society...we barely have time to react, let alone reflect...but you can't 'download' spirituality."

I find it interesting that William used the word "rushing" even in the 1800s. I find a lot of pure wisdom in this old hymn, how about you? What do you see?

What does holiness mean to people these days anyway?

wondering and pondering,

Mama G

What is hospitality?

Thu, 24 Jul 2008 07:22:29 GMT

I have been doing a bit of creative "nesting" these days, something I do in spurts when time gives me freedom to ponder beauty and color and texture. I have also been reading an inspiring bit of snippets from Henri Nouwen gathered together in a book titled, the Dance of Life, Weaving Sorrows and Blessings into One Joyful Step (I LOVE the title!).

May I share some of his deep thoughtful words and ponder with me...

"Hospitality is not to change people, but to offer them space where change can take place...It is not an educated intimidation with good books, good stories, and good works, but the liberation of fearful hearts so that words can find roots and bear ample fruit. It is not a method of making our God and our way into the criteria of happiness, but the opening of an opportunity to others to find their God and their way." (Perhaps this alludes to different love languages?)

"The Paradox of hospitality is that it wants to create emptiness, not a fearful emptiness, but a friendly emptiness where strangers can enter and discover themselves as created free; free to sing their own songs, speak their own languages, dance their own dances, free also to leave and follow their own vocations. Hospitality is not a subtle invitation to adopt a lifestyle of the host, but the gift of a chance for the guest to find his own..."

"Just as we cannot force a plant to grow but can take away the weeds and stones which prevent its development, so we cannot force anyone to such a personal and intimate change of heart, but we can offer the space where such a change can take place."

In this last week I have enjoyed going through the "magic attic" and finding treasures and putting them to new use. I have also created new recipes and planted beautiful plants in my patio, purple and yellow, orange and sage with the lovely smell of lavender. Steve and I have also enjoyed having a more longterm guest, Rebecca B., staying with us while she awaits moving into her new place of residence. She is a delight and inpsires my thinking all the time! Yesterday, three of my girls, popped by, and they brought their beauty and their voices to our home. Thank you Ellyn, Hannah, and Steph...( I am sipping my delicious Mexican Mocha Coffee right now...thanks, Steph.

My prayer is that my home, wherever that may be, may be a place of warmth and freedom to be who God created each of us to be, so that we can collectively image Him and bring Him glory and be that sweet fragrance of Christ that draws the lost and hurting to His LOVE.

Romans 12: 13 "Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality" ( Aren't we all in need somehow?)

Hebrews 13: 1-2 "Keep on loving each other as brothers. Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it."

We made a stranger into a friend on a motorcycle trip to these amaizng falls within the mountains of the Swiss alps...Shelley from California

I guess many are drawn to water. I am praying that Shelley finds He who is the living Water...the seeds have been planted...may they reap a lovely harvest in her heart!

Isn't our Creator God amazing!! I want to "paint" like Him!

blessings to you all

Please Pray for Michele!

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 06:21:32 GMT

Dear Xanga friends,

I do not have much time to focus on weblog entries these days, but I felt compelled to take time to plea for prayer for my beloved kindred spirit friend, Michele or some call her Miss Phi Phi!

She beat skin cancer and now is awaiting further prognosis for breast cancer. Suffice it to say, I love her and want her all better and with a prince by her side!

If you want more about her journey, read my subscribtion, serentymine, that is hers and she is one of the best writers I know!!! She will make you laugh and cry!

So here's to getting her back to Germany to BFA where we desperately NEED her ASAP!

PAGA!

That hideous wig! This would be so bizarre if this was some wierd foreshadowing! No matter how you look at it, SHE IS GORGEOUS INSIDE AND OUT!

PRAY!

June is busting out all over...

Tue, 10 Jun 2008 18:15:13 GMT

So it is June already and I am about to fly to the States for Alliushka's wedding and time with Tabitha and Ryan, Mama and Papa P, Josh and B and Elliott, and so many more!! God is good!

Meanwhile, Steve will take our beloved Tebbes to the airport for their yearlong furlough...so hard to say goodbye to those we have abided with for almost ten years! We have been so blessed though for that time!

Then Steve will take the train up to Hamburg with his motorcycle and then journey to Norway and the Fjords. Something he has always wanted to see! Pray for his safety as he is doing this solo.

Here are a few favorite pics for those who care:

JSB

Suzanne and I doing the Tango...love her!

More of my fovorite people...Michele and Austin...I think that is of one Steve's old choir shirts...hehe funny how things come back.

These are our new adopted girls, Alyssa and Rebecca, I love that REbecca and Steve are wearing purple! They have been such a gift from God as I ache for my own kids far far away! we had way too much fun that night up in the balcony!

Here are my lovely ladies!

Special baptismal prayers:

I will miss Drea so much! Tales of the Kingdom!

Yohan Kim

And now the class of 08 are alum and the school is empty, but I am going to be with loved ones in the States very soon! Take care and Kristen, thanks for checking this site and motivating to keep it up!

Bye for now...

My How time flies!!! It's almost MAY!

Sun, 20 Apr 2008 11:21:53 GMT

So it is April and almost May, and as my beloved walking and praying buddy, Michele, pointed out yesterday...it has been a very long time since I updated this thing and some of you actually check my site, which is amazing to me!

So, I am still here...very busy and maybe even more busy in my head than in "real" life. So much processing going on that perhaps eventually when it is worthy of public reading, I will share more...

But until then...here are some highlights of life since the last entry with pictures, which to me expresses better than anything else because it is all about God, people and creation in my world. So grab your carpet and let's go on a "ride"...

Around the house here in Riedlingen...

This would be Miss Abbybell and Austin the Bard doing the highland fling in our livingroom...amazing dancing gifting!!! Note: this is all important "dance therapy" often needed by stressed seniors.

This would be Princess Stephanie, creator cheffess of endless delectable delights...here she is whipping up Hot chocolate with her own special flair...she also bakes and decorates cakes, pies, gluten free sweets and we are ever eager to try any of her creations that are enjoyed both here in our home as well as at school in my office...she does enjoy popcorn movie time at the Grubbs when her schedule permits...we love her like she is our own. She will be a senior next year...

This would be "dance therapy" in the kitchen with our three week live in adopted son, Merritt and his fair maiden friend, Christine...two lovely souls whom we shall miss after this year's graduation...too many goodbyes here and this heart is getting a bit weary of such things.

This would be Michelle and Hannah wearing my reading glasses...too cute and precious and I will miss them terribly while they will be gone for a whole year furlough in the States...since this picture...Rachelle has joined the Tebbe family and both Tabitha and I were able to witness her arrival between February 25 and 26th...I think they picked the 26th, her grandma's Birthday cause she was all out then...

Minutes after birth and a bit later...

Children are such a gift from the Lord! May we always treat them as lent treaures from the Lord...

So while Tabitha was here with the Kentucky band leading worship for the high school retreat, she was able to witness her first live birth and have a good time with the BFA kids!

Here is the enthusiastic and harmonic pumped up band, led by Ryan and Adam with Kristen and Tabitha on vocals and Kevin on drums...good times!

Retreat was at Nurnburg Castle...pretty cool place!

Tab and Ryan led a small group with many familiar faces, although more grown up then they last saw them.

Moving on to other visitors and guests...

Laura McAdam visited from Wheaton...love that lovely lady kindred heart...I really would love to bequest her my job at BFA...she would be fabulous! And she and Andrew are a beautiful couple inside and out!

Sean Woodward visited at Christmas time...notice the t-shirt and Hannah found him quite interesting too...

More of the class of 03, Christine Wilhelm and new BFA Art teacher, Alyssa Smith...dreams do come true!! May the alum take over the school...and bring on a new legacy...

Kenny Reed, class of 05, victor warrior healed by our Jehovah Rapha of cancer and his fiance, Tiera Loewen, class of 06...soon to be married...isn't God amazing and such a romantic too...I love how He weaves our life stories into such wonderful testimonies...

Grace Boettcher, class of 03 with her hubby as of March...Lord, be with all these couples as they become more and more united displaying the image of God together as one to a world that has become quite cynical to marriage and "forever" kind of love and commitment.

Now we shall move onto "tea parties"...

Three emerging teen ladies in waiting...Kate, Hannah and Karin dressed up from the Grubb "magic attic" practicing their lady skills...what fun!

Alyssa's Taylor art buddy and now BFA elementary art teacher, Rebecca Beeh...celebrating her March Birthday with us...Rebecca has brought a special life and pizazz here with her bubbly dancing adventurous deep heart and she is a lovely compliment to Alyssa, who is a peaceful contemplative gentle spirit...we love them both along with Steph and so many more...

Rebecca at an impromptu dinner a la frishe Luft...she is already getting quite good at German...

Alyssa wearing my new Slovenja hat...I simply want to start singing "I have confidence" from Sound of Music when I look at this picture...she is too adorable for words!

This was the end of Spring break tea party with Beka, Ellyn, Drea, Hannah, and Ellen all wearing my hats...and the hanging monkey is to represent Stephanie since she was home sick and was supposed to share in this tea...I am praying much for her troubling tummy these days...would you believe those bright folding chairs are Steve and I's first chairs when we were married...still getting good use...the pink shawl was my Nanny grandma's and the dishes are our wedding dishes...yes, I am a sentimentalist...

I love her so much my heart hurts...

Second to last for this entry that is getting way too long...is the visit of one of my college choir buddies, Cindy Lewis, (related to Uncle Glen Lewis here at BFA) currently missionary in Indonesia...and her daughter, Val,(who spent Christmas with us)...

Cindy and I joining into the art in front of a nearby home here...

Tabitha got to meet Val while she was here...precious!

Finally, picnic romps with random young friends...

Rebecca, Chris, Molly and Kyle and Steve and I...

Chris Wilhelm made delicious homemade German noodles...Spaetzle for us...

Chris and Molly were on our missions trip to Slovenja and here is the rest of the gang on a walk to the golf course...

And here is one of my favorite contemplation rocks in the woods behind us...

Off to contemplate and seek God's wisdom for life and the future...hope this gave you a better glimpse of my life these days...may it be a pleasing fragrance to My God who blesses us exceedingly abundantly...

hugs and love,

Mama G, Auntie Ne, Ne, Renee or whatever you want to call me

Who Cares about trees?!

Thu, 17 Jan 2008 10:11:42 GMT

This last tree episode was perhaps merely a prelude to another torrent of tears. It was but a few days later that my beloved freind, Michele, the writer, came over with the news of her fighting a new health battle against MAC, a type of skin cancer!!! I for one, am joining in the battle with her in prayer for healing and strength and courage in the battle. PLease join me...

I love her more than words can say!